Friday, 31 January 2014
Said and heard
I'm sure you've come across it, that gap between what you said and what was heard.
It can be frustrating and time-consuming as you have to put right the damage done by a misheard piece of information being passed on.
Or perhaps it was one of those times where you said something in one way and it was taken in a completely different one.
I think of the latter as having been heard through a filter. We all have them. They come from past experiences, learned habits of reaction, expectations of behaviour of others. Whenever you say something innocent and the person you're speaking to takes offence or reacts in a completely unexpected way, ask yourself what sort of filter they might have. If you know them well, this is somewhat easier.
If there is something you need to be heard clearly, have the person repeat back to you what they understand you to have said. It might seem a bit over the top, but it will save a lot of heartache and frustration in the long run.
And try to be aware of your own filters. Measure your reactions to what is said to you and ask yourself whether you are clearly hearing what is being said.
Communication is important. Do it as well as you can.