On Saturday morning I led a class in Biblical Meditation and Imaginative Prayer. It was only a couple of hours, but they were quite intense. This is the fourth or fifth women's retreat event I've led and I can feel the difference now.
At the first retreat I was nervous, I felt anxious standing in front of everyone, even though the group was fairly small. I could feel my voice shaking and I cut short the things I wanted to say because I felt so intensely uncomfortable. All I could think about was sitting down. I felt terribly exposed.
Through the progression of different events that I've led I have learned what I find more comfortable. For example, I prefer to sit with people around a table as I teach, with my laptop at an easy glance. I feel more confident if I write myself a whole script, even if I don't stick to it exactly. Smaller groups suit me better.
I wouldn't say that I don't get nervous anymore, but I am certainly a bit more laid back in that situation now. Through persevering in being obedient to what I feel called to do, I have grown. I have faced the fear and it has grown smaller :)
This is what faith and obedience are all about...stretching us beyond what we believe our capabilities are but listening and learning what will work for us in getting us there...and then we grow somewhere. This is a lovely post.
ReplyDeletewatching someone you love a whole heap grow is a delightful thing to see and have happen. I is a privilege to have participated in Tracy's life.
ReplyDeleteI love this page!! I am so happy that you can feel a difference in your group and that you continue to grow!!
ReplyDeleteHello Tracy!
ReplyDeleteHow are you travelling? Can you believe we're on the cusp of December?
I thought you might like to know that I am hosting Reverb again this year. It'd be a privilege to have you join us.
Everything you need to know can be found at: http://www.katmcnally.com/p/reverb13.html
We kick off on Sunday and it is going to be AMAZING. Hope to see you there!
Kat xxx